Dentist Walter Palmer was set to return to work last week. So why is this news?
Well, you see, he was the guy with the high-powered hunting rifle, who took down local and now Internet favorite Cecil the Lion a few weeks ago while on a hunting expedition to Africa.
It seems this lion was wearing one of those tracking devices on a collar that was specially fitted for him so researchers could track his movements and learn more about his feeding, breeding and exercise habits. But they mostly did it just to find out what the heck a male lion does all day and night since the females do all the work.
The hunter had always wanted to put something in the annoying blank space on the wall in the dental office’s waiting room, so instead of selecting a picture or a painting, he decided to pack his bow and arrow set and hunting rifle and head to Africa to bring back a lion’s head.
He hired a couple of local tour guides he found on Craigslist of Zimbabwe and went hunting. Unfortunately, the lion he happened to bag was a local favorite and in a strange twist, he found himself in the crosshairs of some of the most powerful and influential people imaginable: reality TV stars.
None other than Sharon Osbourne is leading the pack. And she wants Mr. Palmer held accountable. You may know her as the wife of rock star Ozzy Osbourne, who used to bite the heads off bats at concerts. No word yet on whether she would also like her husband tried for cruelty to animals or at least tested for rabies.
He reportedly tried using an arrow from a high-powered bow to fell the lion, but when his Cupid’s arrow didn’t do the trick, blasted him with a high-powered rifle instead. Many claim the poor animal wandered around for almost two days with the arrow stuck in him before the dentist finally finished him off with the gun. Mr. Palmer disputes this account and says they’re just lion.
In any event it is sure to be a turbulent week for him. Protesters will be waiting for him when he returns to work and he will undoubtedly be the target of their wrath similar to the way patients react after a root canal. Quite frankly, I’m not sure he will be able to notice the difference.
If the guy really wanted to enjoy the thrill of dropping a big cat like Cecil, why didn’t he just ask the Denmark Zoo for help? Aren’t they the ones who recently massacred a family of lions and a giraffe (all perfectly healthy by the way) and gloated about it?
If I were he, I would stay out of the public’s eye for a while and not even think about any future trips to Africa. After all, if it’s big game he’s after, there’s an abundance of it closer to home in the state of Michigan. Who hasn’t heard of the Detroit Lions?
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